Nature, Nurture and Society

I have to say that I do agree with John Gray’s idea that men and women are very different. I think that men and women are very different though, due to how society has created roles and gender identities for each sex. While newborns are brand new to the earth and have no behavioral differences or knowledge of true gender yet, we are already buying and dressing them in pink and blue hues with purple and green nurseries. As toddlers, boys are encouraged to play with trucks, cars, and pretend “tools” while girls are playing with doll houses and playing house with their dolls. As these kids get older, it is more acceptable in our society for boys to rambunctiously run around loudly, while some adults may scour if a girl acts the same as a young boy.

I think biology made women and men different as well for reasons that helped us survive many years ago. In my opinion, I think Gray does make some valid points that women are more emotionally in tune in general. However, again I think society has shaped that. If you have ever seen the movie “Tough Guise” you would see that society shapes men to have a strong exterior as well as interior and be powerful, in control and independent. If a man does not conform to these harsh standards, he would be ridiculed.

I loved Professor Kimmel’s lecture! I am a sociologist and/or a psychologist at heart, and loved his statistics, especially in his lecture about parenting and marriage. I find it absolutely fascinating that the U.S. does not have paid parental leave, and is in the same category as some 3^rd world countries. I think Kimmel makes a great point when he says that men could potentially change that. Many people view issues such as parental leave as women’s issues.. when in fact they are parent’s issues. If men stood up for these rights, there is a huge advantage to women and men as Kimmel described. Personally, I think men and women do parent differently due to “nature”. I think women are more sensitive to their child’s needs, but I also do believe that men can also develop that same sensitivity if they are the child’s primary caregiver. In fact, I read a study a few months ago in NY Times that measured the oxytocin hormone levels in both the fathers and mothers of babies right after birth and six months after birth. The mother’s hormones were initially higher, but at the six month mark they were the same. I don’t think this is the result that most people expected from the study. If men are in tune to their children and society accepts men being close and in tune to their children, they will develop the same bond as the mother. 

When examining the nurture element of things, I think that society “nurtures” us into the parent and person we are going to be alongside other biological elements such as personality, hormone levels, etc. I don’t think much has changed with biology over the past 100 years in humans, but as mentioned in Kimmel’s lecture human nature has. We have evolved into more accepting, liberal and most of us are striving for equality. Women are in a completely different place than they were 100 years ago today, thanks to individuals willing to push the envelope and speak out for what is right.